It’s amazing how fast people learn new things in life. Things about their emotions, their actions and their behaviour.
I’ve always believed what whatever I have decided in my life, I would not regret it. I rarely have, except in some exceptional occasions. Because these decisions I made were made with much thought, and consideration of the circumstances. This hasn’t changed.
What surprised me, however, was how when I look back, I can say so coldly that the decision I have made in the past was right, even though it had hurt people. I never saw myself as heartless, or cold. And I never thought I would have said such a thing. It just came out, emotionless, careless, without regret. And I don’t regret even up to this point in time. But it was just stone cold. I feel like those ice queens I’ve seen in the past. I feel wrong.
Or maybe, it’s just because I’ve a paper coming up, and I’m actually getting stressed.
Or maybe, I’m living in denial of a certain fact in life that some people have been trying to tell me, and yet I’ve feigned ignorance. Because I am afraid to face it.
Why, oh why…
Tags: Personal

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