complicated simplicity

It was just an escapade for me, the trek around Europe, and I return to find 2 nice "I’m getting married!" messages, and one nice ‘My kid’s 1month old, where the hell have you been?!’.

I smiled for they are very good friends. I am very happy for them.

Then  I looked back at the 28 days I spend alone and with people, and was remembered the many things going through my mind those 4 weeks, even in the company of Haz at times.

I have moved on many times in the past years, making difficult choices on the ladies in my life. Breakups, tears and disappointments on either sides were obligatory and often not lacking. I often miss that company of a particular someone, just wishing there was support when you needed it. Times in life when you just want to throw everything down and say ‘I give up, really.’ until someone comes along and picks you up during those vulnerable moments.

Then there are those other times when they become your burden, emotionally. Too many things to consider and worry about. Too much energy spent on fighting, sighs and tears on the le femme. And I say, ‘I give up.’

Many questions plague me about my future, and where I will be. Many questions that become more practical rather than idealistic. Geography, status and other matters start to play bigger roles over personalities. Growing up, social circles becomes smaller. And I do prefer to date out of my social circles. But with a smaller circle, it also means meeting less people, getting coped up in work, and not seeing new faces.

Tags: Personal

Similar posts:

1. "Love" on August 9, 2005
2. "Alot like love." on May 19, 2006
3. "MIA-ed" on April 22, 2006
4. "Enjoy. Live. Love." on November 12, 2006
5. "Singapore’s Prejudice" on July 25, 2005